


Jam Out With Your Clam Out

by Eroppai (FalstaffKisaragi)



Category: A Sister's All You Need (Anime), エロマンガ先生 | Eromanga Sensei (Anime)
Genre: Authors, Comiket, Gen, Masturbation, Nudity, Piano, Public Nudity, Story within a Story, light novels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-21
Updated: 2018-04-21
Packaged: 2019-04-25 15:47:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14381853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FalstaffKisaragi/pseuds/Eroppai
Summary: Two prolific light novel authors - Elf Yamada and Nayuta Kani - meet at Comiket and get into an argument about who has the better light novels. This argument turns into an impromptu contest to see who has the sexier writing skills, with dignity at stake for the both of them.





	Jam Out With Your Clam Out

Whoever was in charge of assigning booths at this Comiket would come to regret their decision. Two of the most high profile light novel authors, Elf Yamada and Nayuta Kani, had been given seats next to each other to sell their latest works. Two highly competitive writers with overlapping but distinct ideas of what made a good light novel ended the way those with foresight might have expected. Their sales boomed, but only because they made a scene in the middle of the convention.

“You expect me to compete with this child?” asked Nayuta. “She just has beginner’s luck.”

“I’ll have you know, I am the number one Oricon light novel author, the great Elf Yamada,” she replied.

“Your work is safe and cliche,” said Nayuta, rebutting. “You lay the nudity on heavy, but it’s nearly sexless otherwise.”

Elf stood up from her table, glowering over Nayuta. “That’s because I don’t rely on shock value. It’s all about aesthetic appreciation of the feminine form. Like a nature sprite. I suppose a shut-in like yourself wouldn’t understand nature.”

Nayuta opened a copy of one of her books, flipping through it to find the sauciest passage she had been able to put into paper. She found one with an accompanying illustration, and shoved it in Elf’s face.

“What do you think human bodies are for? Just like an elf. They think so highly of themselves that they don’t need to reproduce,” said Nayuta.

“What?” said Elf, stammering.

“Re-pro-duce. Babymaking. I’ve read through your work, and you don’t even have a single mention of a cock and balls. Who cares about running afoul of the PTA? I’m sure you’ve seen a dick before,” said Nayuta.

In fact, Elf hadn’t. There was a friend in her grade, Megumi, who also claimed that she had, but it was the blind leading the blind on matters of genitalia. Though Elf had been growing closer to her neighbors in recent months, so she hoped that a chance for research would present itself. No such chance had come.

“Just go write for visual novels if you want nothing but people screwing,” said Elf. “I write art! It’s going to top the sales charts and the critics’ charts.”

“Visual novels are a dying breed, oh great Elf,” said Nayuta. “Have you seen the sorts of things that light novels can get away with? _Shimoseka_ is so lewd that it’s been my muse for the past two books. Push the boundaries.”

“You need to stop being so weird,” said Elf. “Refusing an anime adaptation? Are you hobbling your own creative success?”

“Success isn’t defined by money,” said Nayuta. “I have my own reasons.”

“Fine. If you won’t accept my greatness, then I challenge you to a short story writing contest,” said Elf. “Meet me back in my hotel room this evening.”

“You sure you’re up for this? There are things about my writing process that may surprise you,” said Nayuta.

“Bring it!” said Elf.

Being in a crowded room all day, in the middle of a hot summer, had left both writers covered in sweat. They walked back to Nayuta’s hotel room, where Elf had already asked her brother to bring her personal laptop. All of her story files were on there. It was her favorite way of getting herself pumped to write. Nayuta, as far as Elf could tell, had no laptop with her. How was she expected to write?

Nayuta bent down and sniffed Elf’s armpit. It was a potent smell. Even though Elf shaved her pits, the sweat built up on there was arousing to Nayuta. She thought back to all the times she had gotten intimate with Miyako. Elf’s blonde hair reminded her of Ashley Ono, one of the few girls that Nayuta had not been able to seduce into stripping for her. That foreign build and knowledge of perversions was equal to her own.

“Stop sniffing there!” said Elf.

“Not like anyone’s going to notice,” said Nayuta. “Under this outfit, I’ve got a bush under my arms. I’ve got a bush elsewhere too, if you’d like to...”

“Shut up! What does this have to do with light novel writing?” said Elf.

“I was thinking, before we start, you might want to take a shower,” said Nayuta. “You can go first. Don’t all writers get their ideas in the shower? Then they start putting the running water up against their clits and letting it squirt until it spirals down the drain...”

“That’s just you!” said Elf. “But fine. It would be impolite of me to write when I’m so sweaty.”

“Attagirl,” said Nayuta, playfully reaching for her armpits once again.

Nayuta’s room was the same as every other hotel room on the site. No matter where in the world one went, a hotel room looked the same. The shower was tiny, but Elf stripped off her clothes and stepped inside. The hot water rushed over her body as she started thinking of short story ideas she could use to prove to Nayuta why she was the Number 1 Best Selling Oricon Light Novel Author, the Great Elf Yamada.

Elf felt this composition would be insufficient without an illustration to accompany it. Oh, if only she could have Eromanga beside her right now, drawing out one of her characters in all their beauty. A picture is worth a thousand words, and with that picture she’d show Nayuta the value of her story. After all, when it comes to light novels, the first thing people see is the cover. Anime adaptations are represented by key visuals. The manifestation of her words made art should be her final trump card, but she couldn’t do that in this time crunch of a challenge.

Two bottles of creamy root beer were placed on the nightstand between the beds. Elf’s laptop had been set up at the edge of the desk, and her clothes had been stashed away in the hotel safe. When Elf stepped out of the shower, she was greeted by a nude Nayuta sitting on the bed, waiting for her while idly scrolling through her phone, preparing to write the next phase of her novel.

“My hotel room, my rules,” said Nayuta. “You think I didn’t notice that you were naked just out of frame in half of your blog posts? We’re all nudists here, so let’s bare ourselves through our writing.”

“Where are my clothes?” asked Elf.

“In the safe. I’ll give you the password once the competition’s over,” said Nayuta. “I just want to see you in your natural element. Look at you, all you’ve got is a little peach fuzz. So cute.”

“Your rules will cower before my writing skills,” said Elf.

“Let’s make this a little more interesting,” said Nayuta. “A dare.”

“I’m the number one Oricon author, I’m not going to risk my reputation,” said Elf.

“I saw on your blogs that you like to play the piano naked,” said Nayuta. “That’s why I’m so interested in you. A fellow nudist.”

“I’m not a nudist, I’m the reincarnation of a forest elf,” she replied. “It’s the way of our people.”

“Whatever you call yourself, Yamanaka,” said Nayuta. “There’s a piano in the restaurant downstairs. When the staff is asleep, we can sneak in and I’ll let you play your favorite song in the buff.”

“That’s nonsense. What if we get caught?” said Elf.

“That’s the fun of it,” said Nayuta. “Two nude girls, wandering around a hotel at night. It’s the kind of experience Itsuki would never let me have. If you win, I won’t force you to do it. But if you lose, I’m going to Emily Granger’s super erotic piano recital.”

“Who told you my real name?” said Elf.

“You were never very good at maintaining your public persona,” said Nayuta. “So, Emily. Let’s begin.”

Nayuta lifted up her arms, exposing the thick silvery hair underneath her armpits. She hadn’t showered, and seemingly had no intention of doing so. Nayuta had already marked the bed on the left as her territory, going by the damp spots around her crotch. Elf moved to her chair and opened up her word processor, preparing for a fight.

“Good, you’re fired up,” said Nayuta. “Normally, I’d be making up stories with my friends, but I’ve already proven to them multiple times how great I am. An outsider like you, I’ll go easy on.”

“I am no outsider. I can produce a book in the time it takes you to blink,” said Elf.

“We’re not writing a full novel, Fairy Yamada,” said Nayuta. “We’ll each write a prologue that could be the start of a new series. No more, no less. Then we’ll read them aloud, and whoever writes a story that makes the other want to squirt wins.”

“Don’t be so crude. This isn’t pornography, this is art!” said Elf. “Why is that your metric for success?”

“I’m feeling horny,” said Nayuta. “You don’t know what you’ve been missing until you experience it. There was this one girl who came up to my booth joking that she was interested in dicks. Picked up one of my books and read a page. Ran off to the bathroom clenching her legs.”

Elf had a feeling she knew who that was. Must have been one of Masamune’s friends. What was she doing at Comiket?

“How long can we take?” asked Elf.

“Until midnight,” said Nayuta. “I’ll be done long before that.”

“So will I!” said Elf.

Nayuta had no shame. As she rolled about on the bed, tapping words into her phone with a metronomic click-click-click, each page being written out a few keystrokes at a time, Elf couldn’t help but to look at her. She spread her legs and bent over on the bed with her butt hanging in the air, her cheeks spreading apart to expose a light brown asshole that puckered in excitement from every gesture.

Elf kept herself poised, thinking of the words that should fill her page. Normally, her novels were self-indulgent, as many light novels were. She was writing her fetishes and her preferred scenarios onto the page. It lacked the weight of a Natsume Soseki or a Haruki Murakami, but not every writer needed to aspire to those heights. However, this was different.

She was writing for Nayuta. Without an artist at her side, she had to make Nayuta cum through words alone. To create such a vivid image that she’d launch an arc like a water fountain and leave the hotel room with a strong smell that would linger until the morning. She wanted to get inside Nayuta’s head and find out what made her horny. From the conversations she had overheard during the day, it was tough to get a read on what Nayuta wanted from her fiction.

All she knew was that this girl was extreme. Proportion or possibility could exist outside the realm of the plausible, and the amount of setup she’d need should be minimal. Yet Nayuta couldn’t have become a writer through that alone. There had to be a certain something to her writing that kept drawing people back despite the brazenness of its prose. Were her works really that good?

As she tapped away at her phone, Nayuta thought she had this in the bag. While Elf was a bold one, most of her weaknesses came from lacking the experiences in life that Nayuta had gone through.

“Goody two-shoes little Elf princess,” thought Nayuta. “She talks a big game, but she looks like she’s never been bullied in middle school. If she thought for a second about how filthy sex can actually be, she’d pee herself. I don’t even have to turn out my best work for her to start getting wet.”

Nayuta cracked open one of the root beers and downed a large gulp. She burped, and immediately resumed her writing. Elf looked over at the nightstand. Nayuta had set aside another root beer and a bunch of snacks for her, all for the taking. Yet, she was in the zone right now. If she got up, it would break her concentration. She had to take this writing challenge seriously.

“I wish we were able to provide illustrations,” thought Elf. “If Eromanga was here, I would show her the majesty of my stories.” She wondered if it would be wise, or even allowed by the rules of the contest, to call Sagiri at this time of night. She was either hard at work on another batch of illustrations, or already asleep. Since she spent all her time in her room, it was difficult to know.

“I know what you’re thinking,” said Nayuta. “No drawings. I don’t even talk to my illustrator that much. Whatever they do with my text is good enough. The words carry everything. If I wanted to write a story and draw, I’d be a manga artist.”

“You’re only saying that because you can’t draw,” said Elf.

“Neither can you,” replied Nayuta. She was right. Both of them had mediocre drawing skills at best.

The moon rose higher in the sky, just outside the closed curtains of the dim hotel room. Coming up with a story from scratch was easy. The two of them had dozens of half-formed ideas borne of fetish and fantasy whirling around in their heads, waiting to be put onto the page. Putting it into text was another matter, with the schedules of writing and promoting their next light novel, and anime in Elf’s case, on top of living.

“Food court food does not sit well on my stomach,” said Nayuta, her stomach gurgling. She was thinking about ordering room service, but wanted to save it until after the contest had finished. “Yamaoka, I’m going to use the little girls’ room.”

The light flicked on.

“At least close the door,” Elf said. “And it’s Yamada!”

Nayuta loudly used the bathroom. Elf could hear every drop of water, blast of wind and plopping sound in the toilet bowl. The room wasn’t that large, and Nayuta’s stomach had been holding in a lot since this evening. The faint smell came from the bathroom, nearly throwing Elf off her groove. She stomped over and tried to close the door, but noticed something about her chair when she had gotten up.

The spot where she had been sitting was obvious. An indentation in the shape of her butt had been left behind in the chair, along with plenty of sweat, with a light hint of something else. Elf felt something slimy and warm running down her legs. True, a lot of her light novel writing was putting what turned her on into text form, but the idea of doing it while being watched by someone else had gotten to her more than she expected.

As Elf stood there, frozen in thought, the toilet flushed and Nayuta washed her hands, quickly returning to putting the final few words into her light novel prologue masterpiece. Nayuta grinned as she passed by Elf.

“It’s all yours, kid,” said Nayuta. “But no masturbating. We have to save that for the big show.”

Nayuta had wanted to masturbate in front of Itsuki for ages, but he had never given her the go-ahead. If only he asked, she would have stripped and begun plucking at her clitoris faster than he would have had time to process it. That was why she wrote. That was what she loved about writing. To push past the expected rules of literature and make something that was steamy and artful, that could excite someone’s mind and their loins. While she didn’t bother looking into writing feedback outside her circle of friends, Elf was the first test case she’d had in a long time, and she relished the opportunity to make her cum with words alone.

Two hours passed with only the occasional remark from either of the girls towards each other. Entire sentences were replaced and character names were changed several times, until both of them declared their works done. There were no printers in the hotel, so they instead emailed each other their works as a text file. Elf and Nayuta sat beside each other on the bed, playing a quick game of rock-paper-scissors to decide who got to read their story first.

Nayuta read Elf’s story first.

 _The Forest Fairy, Hand in Hand_ by Elf Yamada

_Hawk Rutherford is my name. In this world, magic is as commonplace as running water. Because of this, all devices run on magic, and the world is in the middle of a renaissance. However, a new church, one that doesn’t believe in the spirits of nature from which we draw our power, is seeking to abolish these natural beauties while hoarding all the magic for themselves. I thought I would go about my life ignoring them, until one day, everything changed._  
_...._  
_I’m not that skilled at magic, so I was out by the edge of the woods practicing my spells. Every time I hit something, it grows larger. I was trying to use it to help my family with their food rations, but it got so big that even the church’s goons had noticed. My little sister asked me to head to the woods to practice on my own._  
_...._  
_While I was out there, I felt something nipping at my heels. The fairies that lived around the woods. I had heard rumors that they lived in a society too small for humans to meaningfully interact with. As they worked on belief, the ability of people to see them with time had faded._

“What’s with all the exposition?” asked Nayuta. “Just throw the reader in the deep end, they’ll get it.”

“It’s not like I’m expecting them to carry every word of this to the anime!” said Elf.

“I’m dry as the Tottori sand dunes. Where’s the eroticism Yamamura Elf is so known for?” said Nayuta.

“It’s coming. Keep reading, crab woman!” said Elf indignantly.

_An errant spell was cast. The next thing I knew, I saw a woman standing beside me. Only the tatters of her clothes covered up anything important. She was tall and slender, with long hair that flowed like a river, and eyes that sparkled like dewdrops. She looked at her hand, let out a confused scream, and fell onto my waist._  
_“Huh?” I asked._  
_“When you were sleeping, I would always rest here when I was feeling tired,” she said. “I’m Lora, one of the fairies from the woods. When your spell hit me, I... became big. Do you know how to reverse it?”_  
_“I barely knew how I cast it!”_  
_Her warm body embraced me, her wings fluttering, blowing my hair. I was going to have to explain a lot when I got back to the village._

“This isn’t at an adult publisher, I can only go so far,” said Elf. She looked down, and noticed that Nayuta was holding her legs together, trying to hide the wet spot that was forming underneath her thighs. “Well?”

“Are you implying that when this fairy girl was small, she enjoyed cuddling our hero’s dick like a hug pillow?” asked Nayuta.

“You don’t have to say it so bluntly!” said Elf.

“You’re the one who wrote it,” said Nayuta. “At that size, one cumshot would be enough to smear her entire body in semen. If she can change size in later chapters... the erotic possibilities of this book are far naughtier than I expected from you. Maybe you turned me on a little.”

“Of course I did. If I got Eromanga to illustrate this...”

“I don’t care about who your illustrator is,” said Nayuta. “Read my story next.”

 _The Princess’ New Clothes ~Summoning Exquisite~_ by Nayuta Kani

_I’m Mana Hayasaka, an ordinary school student. Or I would be, if I was still going to school. I had been unable to focus in class, and that was because of my unstoppable libido. Whenever a test was done, I would think dirty thoughts to myself and let myself become lost in my thoughts, a wet spot appearing on my skirt. Eventually, my teachers caught on._  
_They said I was setting a bad example, and my parents were called in. At that point, I was being harassed by the boys and pilloried by the girls. I wanted nothing more to do with this stupid education system._

“Are you working through some issues?” asked Elf.

“Aren’t all writers?” asked Nayuta.

_Day after day, I wondered when I’d find someone who could handle me. Men or women, it didn’t matter. I just wanted skinship. That’s when I found a strange envelope in the mail. It was addressed to me in particular, with an address in letters that I couldn’t read. Without thinking, I opened the envelope and signed my name on the bottom of an elaborate letter. Holding it in my hand, the world around me shifted._  
_When I opened my eyes, I was in a world like you’d see in a fantasy RPG. I’d been playing some gacha games on my phone, and was aware of just how many characters there were for me to love. This world looked like one of those, but the outfits being worn resembled nothing I’d seen before._  
_Because they were nothing. Only loincloths and sarashis, for men and women alike. The climate was warm, but I was taken aback by how hot I suddenly felt in my clothes that I had been wearing in my dark room._

“Is this going to be one of those overpowered stories? They’re in vogue these days, but I never needed to write one,” said Elf.

“Those are overall pretty sloppy. I’m doing something a little different,” said Nayuta. “I have a girl protagonist, for one.”

“So this isn’t a scrapped otome game where you have a bunch of hot guys but the leading lady never once thinks about their dicks?” asked Elf.

“I’ve gotten offers to write for an otome game, but that would get in my way of my great seducing Itsuki plan,” said Nayuta. “No, this is much saucier than that.”

_I made my way to a small castle on the horizon. In there, I saw an empty throne. The empty throne room seemed like it was calling out to me. I sat down on the throne, and picked up a cape from the back of the seat. As it wrapped around my body, the cape seemed to disappear, becoming one with the light._  
_My body felt comfortably warm. If someone walked into a room like this... the thought turned me on too much. I reached between my legs. At that moment, a rainbow, refracted from the crystals in the windows, shone upon my crotch._  
_A young knight walked in, and screamed aloud._  
_“It’s her! The princess who was foretold has come to us at last!”_  
_It’s about time I found someone who could explain what was in that letter._

“This is just an excuse to write your fetishes into a story,” said Elf.

“Rich, coming from you,” said Nayuta. “Look at your peach fuzz. It’s already getting splashback from your arousal. That means I win.”

“No, I win,” said Elf.

“How are we supposed to measure this?” asked Nayuta.

They stood opposite each other on the hotel floor, spreading their legs and their pussies, trying to show to each other who was wetter. Elf tried to shine the light on the stains on her legs, but Nayuta was so aroused she was starting to show white, creamy smegma on her lips. Nayuta and Elf stared at each other with a glaring passion, where the feelings of rivalry, arousal and trying to get a good look at the others’ pussy collapsed into a strange, homoerotic mix of emotions that neither of them could fully untangle from the stories they had just read.

“Yours had better characters. People can get aroused easier once they love the characters,” said Nayuta. “But that doesn’t mean I won.”

“You’re much bolder in your eroticism. Very avant-garde, Kani,” said Elf. “But that doesn’t mean I won.”

“It’s a draw,” they said.

With both of them agreeing it was a draw, the final results were decided. Each of them agreed to buy the complete series that the other had produced, which turned out to be an even four volumes apiece. However, the final part of their wager was that Elf would show Nayuta exactly how she got her inspiration.

They slipped on the bathrobes from the hotel room, trying to appear as though they had gotten out of the shower and were heading down for a late night snack, even though much of the hotel was closed at this time of night. They reached the piano lounge. Nayuta laid a towel over the chair, and asked Elf to play her a number.

The two of them let the bathrobes hit the carpet. It was the biggest space that either of them had ever been in naked. Nearly everyone was asleep, but it felt like someone was watching them. Elf took a deep breath to calm the pounding of her heart, and settled on a public domain classical piece by Franz Lizst. She had purchased a doujinshi of Lizst and Chopin at this Comiket, so classical music was fresh on her mind.

The gentle plinking of the piano keys carried across the empty hotel floor, echoing off the decorated walls with a gentle noise. The way Elf played the tune near-flawlessly, not embarrassed in the least by her nudity, was more erotic to Nayuta than anything she had encountered that night. It was the same thing she hoped Itsuki would some day find sexy about her. Confidence was a wonderful wellspring of eros, far more than shame, despite what her colleagues in the light novel industry thought.

Elf finished the first movement of her piece, and Nayuta politely clapped. She slapped her legs together, splashing a bit of pussy juice onto Elf’s thighs.

“Bravo,” whispered Nayuta.

Elf was about to begin the second movement of her piece when she heard footsteps walking through the first floor of the hotel. Nayuta turned the light from her phone towards the seats in the piano lounge. It was two boys, between Elf and Nayuta’s age, walking through the hotel lobby in the dead of night.

“Hello, boys. What are you doing?” asked Nayuta.

“You’re one to talk!” said the younger of the two. “You’re... naked.” He tried to cover his eyes.

“What’s in the bag?” asked Nayuta.

The bag was filled with 18+ doujinshi collected from across the floor of Comiket. The collection spanned anime across multiple genres, from epic fantasy to daily life, but all of the covers had big-breasted girls in seductive poses. The older of the two boys had picked them up to share with the younger, but left the bag at Big Site, and had made a late night run to retrieve it.

“Hey, Yamada, I think there’s one for your anime in here,” said Nayuta, pulling up a cover with a dark elf. “Were you two going to go back to your hotel room and masturbate over your haul?”

“No... that’s for when we get home,” said the younger.

“Yes,” said the older.

“Boys, boys, if you want to tug one out, you have two beautiful naked girls right here. We’ll even give you a sample of new stories by Elf Yamada and Nayuta Kani if you keep quiet about what you saw here,” said Nayuta.

“Agreed,” said the boys simultaneously.

“Now pull out your cocks,” said Nayuta. “I want to see them hard and throbbing.”

Nayuta had always been naked with other girls, but seeing a man’s cock, even if it wasn’t her beloved Itsuki’s, turned her on in a way she didn’t know she was capable of.

Elf started playing her music once again. She could feel even the muted vibrations from the piano resonating through her body with each plink of the keys. Normally, Elf didn’t consider piano playing a sexual thing. It was spiritual, for inspiration, for me time. But with Nayuta presiding over the four-way masturbation session in the dimly lit hotel lobby, she felt the eroticism of music for the first time, using her fingers deftly on the keys as she would on her own wet pussy.

As the song approached its climax, Nayuta grabbed onto the boys’ dicks on her own, getting to her knees and stroking them off in time with the music. The feel of two hot, throbbing shafts pulsing in her palm made her legs drip with sticky pussy juice, her clit becoming hard and pointed. She wanted to brush her clit against the boys’ legs and cum over them with her squirt until they smelled of her scent.

The movement finished. Elf made the towel wet with her juices, and the boys’ cocks came onto Nayuta’s chest. She scooped up some of it with her fingers, and offered a small fingertip amount to Elf, who sucked it off her fingers sensually. It was bitter, but not unpleasant.

At the conclusion of the evening, the four of them took a picture and left the hotel lobby. Nayuta had only learned the boys’ names long enough to send them the picture, before deleting their contacts off her phone immediately. Elf, still panting from the thrilling orgasm she had experienced, walked back to her hotel room with Nayuta with a deep blush and an audible heart palpitation.

“That was fun. But I’m still going to outsell your next book,” said Nayuta.

“What did you say?” said Elf. “Clearly my series are superior! Once I obtain an unbeatable illustrator, I will return to the number one spot!”

“Without your anime, no one would know who you are at all,” said Nayuta.

“At least my stories are easy to make into anime,” said Elf.

The two of them continued arguing. For the final day of Comiket, they were exhausted from lack of sleep, leaving their editors wondering why they had put in such a poor show on their last day. Thus began one of the more infamous friendly rivalries among light novel authors.

**Author's Note:**

> Two light novel writers who enjoy working in their birthday suits is a fun concept to put together. While I find Elf and her support cast to be nicer people and easier to write for, the sheer boldness of Nayuta also has its perks.


End file.
